Seven months ago I got married to my husband who’s in the United States Army. We are both from Orlando, Florida and met in high school. He’s been stationed in Virginia for a little over a year now and two months ago after getting married, I left Orlando to be with him and start our lives as a married couple here in Virginia. The process of leaving my apartment, my job, my church, my mom, sister and niece was difficult for me. My life was completely changing, my job changed, my home changed, my environment changed, everything suddenly became different. It’s been a hard time for me. I’m now working from home while my husband works all day out of the home, I don’t have friends or family here, I no longer have a home church. It feels lonely. Learning to live with someone you’ve never lived with has been a struggle as well. I have to learn what someone else likes and dislikes in the home, we’ve been learning how to compromise, It’s been tough. Some days I feel happy, other days I feel sad and lonely. Im the kind of person who needs to be around people, spend time with people and hug and interact. So coming here has been a huge change for me. And I’ve been happy, lost, confused, worried and anxious. An emotional roller coaster. But one thing I know is that God has a purpose for everything.
In the mornings before I start working, I’ll put on some worship music and read a few chapters in the Bible. Just spend time with God before my day starts. A song I’ve heard over and over again and I’ll usually skip, began playing and this time I let it. It’s a known song, New Wine by Hillsong Worship. This specific morning was a tough one for me. I just meditated on the lyrics. The song says:
“In the crushing
In the pressing
You are making
New wine”
and another part says
“I came here with nothing
But all You have given me
Jesus, bring new wine out of me”.
And those words just begin to speak and minister into my life.... I came to Virginia with nothing, I left all that I knew back home for my marriage, for my husband for God. This is what God wanted. He brought me here to bring out new wine. The song says “when I trust you, I don’t need to understand”. And though I don’t understand what God is doing in my life right now or in my marriage, he knew we needed to be away. He knew we needed to focus on ourselves individually and as a couple for something greater. Biblically speaking, new wine means a transformation. A new era, God is telling me that I am about to encounter him like never before. It’s like sometimes we don’t trust because we’re afraid of the unknown but God is good and we don’t have to understand, he just wants us to walk, move, push through the pressing and the crushing because there is something bigger and better in the end. Loving God takes sacrifice, it takes pain. But the reward is always so much better. I’m in a season of transition and I’m no longer scared or sad. I’m excited and in anticipation for what my God is going to do with me but most importantly me and my husband, together.
-Tiffany Bauta-Fernandez
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